Birds of a feather, flock together. We’ve heard it countless times, but do we really pay attention?
As we grow older, and move in different directions of our lives, it is important to make sure that we are doing things that make us happy. Things that we are proud of, and associating with people that won’t embarrass us. There. I said it.
Sometimes, it isn’t a person. Sometimes you just don’t want to be associated with certain activities, or a certain type of lifestyle. Many people will say, “Oh, if that’s your real friend, you’ll work through it”. HELLLOOOO, I don’t HAVE to work through anything. Yea we may have had some good times in college like 5 years ago, but it is totally okay to outgrow your friends!
So how do we make sure that we are accepting of all individuals, but still maintain our own image?
- Keep it casual- Sometimes the person we may not want to be associated with is an old friend. Someone you used to know. I have found that keeping it casual, and distant helps. There is nothing wrong with keeping it light.
- Letting people know you are no longer interested in that activity, but suggesting something new-” You know, I used to love doing *insert old interest* on the weekends, but I’m not interested in that anymore. Would you like to join me *insert new activity*” that way you’ve made it clear that you don’t want any more invites, but you still want to hang out. They may or may not be interested, but you tried. Straight and to the point.
- Ghosting- While I don’t personally think it’s polite, it works. Don’t respond in the group message, ignore the evites, etc. They’ll eventually stop coming in.
We gotta stop hiding under this patina of wanting to be nice. Stop being superficial. Be polite, but be honest.
How do you keep your own image, among those you don’t really want to be seen with, but can’t get rid of them? I know it can be difficult if it’s family. Can’t get rid of those…. 😀